Sunday gratitude
Season 34 of Survivor taught me something important
In 2017 our kids were 13, 11 and 7. Dedicated Survivor fans, we tuned in for Season 34. It was an all star season, and one contestant, Zeke, was competing back-to-back right after completing Season 33 which we had also watched.
In the middle of Season 34 one contestant, in a desperate attempt to stay in the game, outs Zeke for being transgender.
By that point in the show we knew that Zeke worked in finance. We loved how he often celebrated moments of proving things to himself, like that he could start a fire or win a challenge. He was a favorite of ours. A fun, relatable, savvy player who coordinated blindsides and seemed like someone we’d want to get to know. When he was outed, it was the first time in my life that I had ever gotten to know someone (albeit on tv) before knowing their gender history.
I still remember the five of us sitting on our sectional couch, the room darkened, and the light from the tv dappling over us like water. Jake was 11, we were just starting his transition journey, and in my head it felt like a bunch of legos clicking into place. I was upset for Zeke, of course. At the same time, I saw that Jake was going to grow up and be a man, and that lots of people would get to know him without knowing his gender history and that would be both amazing and always a little scary. I felt the way my own assumptions about gender biased the way I read other people, and the way my own blindspots could be a set up for feeling shocked. But I also understood that Jake would mostly grow up to just be a guy named Jake.
I’m ever grateful to Zeke for being brave enough to be himself on Survivor. He endured a transgender person’s worst nightmare and showed the world that he could come out the other side and thrive.
If something in this post moved you, if you learned something new, if reading this made you feel more empowered to support the trans community, I hope you’ll consider sharing my free newsletter with a friend! My hope is to double my subscribers this month. Let’s do this!
See you tomorrow! XO